and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
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