So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize