My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Randomize
