I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Are we in a gay sports bar?
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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