i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
