it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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