sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Randomize
