Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
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This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
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We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
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