Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
