Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
