jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize