It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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