I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
