Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
