South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
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