you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
