Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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