I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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