Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Having a random hookup so left but love u
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
