He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
