I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
