called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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