she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
