just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Randomize
