I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Even the bartender felt bad for me
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Randomize
