Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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