Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
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