drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
