I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize