Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
