dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
