She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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