am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
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