I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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