Tell her she can't have a vagina
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
My liver is preforming stress tests.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
