yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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