you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
