The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
