Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
