I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
i think im in europe. pls send help
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