but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
