For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
