I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
