btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
