jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
