Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
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