brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Randomize
