I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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