Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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