I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
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The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
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well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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