Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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